


The Reaper And The Officer

by TsukioMoon



Category: Gintama, Okikagu - Fandom
Genre: 18 Years old Kagura, 20 Years Old Shimura Shinpachi, 22 Years Old Okita Sougo, 22 years old Kamui, F/M, Siscon Kamui, The Reapers AU, gintama au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-05
Updated: 2018-06-15
Packaged: 2019-05-18 15:41:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 14,632
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14855541
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TsukioMoon/pseuds/TsukioMoon
Summary: An AU where instead of ignoring her blood Kagura follows it and takes pride in it. Not to mention that she’s in the most fearful gang in Edo called The Reapers. Her elder brother Kamui being the commander over it.What will she do when a complete stranger just needs to destroy and forcefully get into her life?How will this stranger react when she gains a place in his life?





	1. The Reapers

**Author's Note:**

> I originally posted this on FF.Net but hey, why not here too. And I just want you guys to be fully aware that I have no idea how to properly use this website yet. So ehm, expect tons of mistakes. -_-
> 
> Warning: OOC Kagura (I’ll try to keep her in character minus the ‘not likes to kill’ persona), I’m not good with Kamui’s personality so I’m probably gonna fail good time. I mean, he’s just an impossible character to... yeah. Also some slight gore in the beginning. It’s not very detailed so I think it’ll be alright. Probably high risk for more gore in the future. OOC Kamui with sister complex, Dadtoki, Bropachi. Do I need to say more?
> 
> Disclaimer: this fantastic anime and manga together with all the characters are owned by Hideaki Sorachi! I only own the plot of this story. Nothing else!

Okita Sougo, the first division captain of Shinsengumi has never in his whole 22 years of life seen such a disaster before. Sure, he’s seen pretty much everything throughout his years of being a police officer. But this certainly took the price.

Even if it weren’t officially announced that it’s them yet, only one solution crossed his mind upon seeing all of this, there was no mistaking it. After hearing all about them over the past four years. This mess (murder) can only have been The Reapers fault. The elite assassination group only the strongest can joins. It doesn’t matter what or who you are, as long as you’re strong, you’re welcome. That’s what he’s heard. They are also the only ones attempting murders nowadays. That’s not all, however, the Reapers always ends their murders with R marks made entirely by blood on the walls or out of body parts on the ground, disgusting.

This time, it was a bloody R mark on the right wall of the alleyway. He watched as the blood steadily yet slowly made its way down on the cold ground beneath.

The Reapers. The disgusting yet fascinating Reapers.

Blood Shattered walls and body parts scattered across the alleyway. Out gouged eyes and fingers detached from their respective hands. Scratch that, everything is detached from where it originally belonged. The metallic scent from the red and juicy blood is all too familiar for him. But that’s just how it is when you’re a bloodthirsty killer working for the Bakufu.

The other Shinsengumi officers that’s been witnesses for this chaos before made entirely by one to five reapers before always talks about it. The gore, how disgusting it is. They always tell him that they still have nightmares of what they saw those times when they were at the crimes scenes; made entirely by loose body parts and blood. They say that they puke whenever they think about it, and they do. He always shrugs them off. Saying that he’s seen it all already throughout the years. That it can’t be that bad, they’re just overreacting and has weak stomachs’. Looking at this now, with his own crimson colored orbs, he finally realizes how wrong he’s been.

He may be a murderer, but these Reapers are total monsters. Not that he minded, the more inhuman and monstrous they are, the funnier they are to kill. The only thing bugging him, however, is that his coworkers haven’t been lying. It’s his first time seeing a murder caused by a Reaper. Or, more likely, officially seeing the aftermath of the dead bodies (humans, but could they still be called that?) caused by the reapers. Whenever he’s gotten a real chance, however, the bodies (or what was left of them) were covered in white sheets. The four latest years, he’d been assigned to take care of the princess Soyo-hime, the Kiheitai, and other Jouinshi rebels. He had really missed something so much better than that! ‘So this is how dangerous and aggressive they really are?’

If they can do this much damage to the elite Mimawarigumi police officers without that much trouble, (it certainly didn’t look like they had any trouble disentangling them at all) then he just found himself some new worthy (soon dead) opponents to toy around with. He felt his sadistic side tingling. Tingling to finally meet these Reapers, once and for all.

Despite seeing all this gore. He couldn’t help but smile in a sadistic manner. He feels how Hijikata looked dumbfoundedly at him; wondering what the hells wrong with him. He didn’t care about it though. Because soon, he’d make sure every female yato in the reapers became M’s. His personal M’s. It doesn’t matter that they’re Amanto's. Their race is like a cousin race to the human race anyway.

And as rumors said, there is this one special, totally untamable not to mention completely stunning and beautiful female yato beast in The Reapers. His commander Kondou-san even told him that she’s one of two suspects in this murder case. As all her murders always end in a similar way. Sure, almost all the members of the Reapers were savage. But only two members were this merciless. 

The Leader of the gang, The Lightning Spear along with the Untamable Beast, are the totally merciless ones. He found himself innerly hoping that the one behind it all will be the Beastie. He wants to meet this mysterious female killer.

Wait, what was it they also called her again? Ah right, the Queen. The Yato Queen.

As if he’d drop low enough to call someone Queen.

Princess is okay, he often guards princes Soyo-Hime anyway. But not in a hundred years will he call anyone a queen. He’d just go with the Untamable Beast. Though she wouldn’t be untamable for long, that’s for sure.

Very, very exciting. Not to mention fun. For Okita Sougo that is.

His blood red eyes now gleaming with mischief. He’s getting impatient, so he decided to ask (annoy) his superior. “Hijikata-saan~, got any clues if it’s the beast herself or not? I’m getting bored out of my mind.”

“The hell Sougo! You’re here to investigate just like me! The hell do you think you’re doing slacking of and grinning like an idiot! I get that you’re a sadist by heart but you can’t gain that much pleasure from this! This is just straight out horrible, you wanna commit seppuku?!” Sougo looked closely as his vice commander Hijikata’s cigarette almost fell out his mouth in rage. He really wants to kill the bastard.

“Ano, Hijikata-san, do you know why the Untamable Beast has two titles?” He decided to straight out ignore Hijikata’s “small” seppuku threats.

“Didn’t you hear what I just told you brat!? Go commit seppuku, The Beast’s titles are no big deal anyway. The people who admire her calls her The Yato Queen. While those who fear her call her by The Untamable Beast. It’s as simple as that.”

Sougo grumbled for a minute after hearing the answer. ‘Is there seriously people admiring her? It must be other Yato's or sick Amanto's out there with sick fetishes or something, but I can’t help but feel curious about who she is. She’s certainly stronger than the average yato. I’d really like seeing her dropping down before my knees and pleading.’

After staring at the young adult before him for a straight minute; in silence, Hijikata simply scoffed at him and told him to get back to work, which Sougo gladly ignored and continued to sort out his thoughts, when he was done with his slightly sadistic dreams he asked yet another question.“Is there no title for in between. I neither fear her nor do I admire her.”

“No, there is none in between. As there are only people who either admire or fear her. If you’d like you can just make a new title for her to call her by, but I doubt anyone would understand who you’re referring to as you interact, now go do your job and ask around for witnesses already, or commit Seppuku!”

“Geez, what you talk today Hijibaka.”

With that, the flaxen-haired officer turned around and started to walk down the eerie alleyway with his long sandy-haired ponytail swaying by the small breezes and a slightly enraged Hijikata screaming after him. “You were the one who asked me from the very beginning! And don’t call me Hijkbaka! Come back here and do your job already you punk!”  
————————————————————————  
“So, Kagura-chan. Why did you need to kill those people from the Mimawarigumi so roughly? They may have gotten some small information about us Reapers, but they were still innocent people. They didn’t deserve it!”

Blue eyes looked up from a bowl of rice and landed on a guy with black hair and glasses, clearly in a bored manner.

“But Shinpachi! They almost found out about the Reapers hideout! We can’t have that! Or that’s what Gin-chan, Takasugi, and Kamui-nii told me. I just did my job, yes!? Even you told me that! Besides, aren’t we Reapers well known for being brutal already?” She said it with such a monotone and bored tone you could think she’s actually a robot. Which, (un)fortunately she’s not. No robot could possibly have that much bloodlust. But who is he to judge? Everything!

“That is true, but we didn’t mean that you should torture them to death, besides, we may be brutal and savage. But not heartless! You do this all the time! At least show them some mercy. I’m sure Takasugi-san and Gin-san would agree with me on that, But I’m not so sure about your brother…”

Kagura nodded her head in agreement with that last comment before speaking in her defense. “You’re boring yes, Megane!”

“Oiiiiii! Don’t call me that! I’m more than just my glasses you know!” Shinpachi forcefully pulled up his glasses that had dropped down his nose to show how irritated he was getting at the redhead before him.

Kagura rolled her eyes in annoyance and ignorance when she suddenly got a craving to tease the 20 years old.“Yeah, you’re right.”

*Finally, someone who understands!”

Blue orbs glinting with bad intentions and stupidity. “A virgin. You’re also a virgin.”

“Oiiiiiiiii! I said stop it!” Shinpachi felt as if he just shouted his lungs out at the girl. They may be childhood friends, but she sure as hell didn’t know how to treat them right. And with such a sensitive subject too. She surely was a younger female version of her brother all right.

Kagura shrugged off his little panic attack and screaming behavior, getting back to eating her egg on rice.

Shinpachi, clearly tasting his defeat (once again) stood up to leave while thinking to tell her something. Hesitating he then calls out to her. “Ah and Kagura-chan”

Kagura yet again switched her attention from the food before her and towards the glasses stand. A little annoyed over disturbing her twice already. “Yes?”

“You know you’re an adult now. You can make your own decisions. You don’t need to follow the Reapers if you don’t want to. I get that you want to follow your brother bu-“

Kagura quickly interrupted him, feeling slightly annoyed, did he really think that she’s following her brother ‘just because’? Because she has nowhere else to go. That’s so not it, she has plenty of other places to go to. Damn Megane. “-Shut up Megane. I’m following my brother because I want to and I admire him, I don’t have anything against killing anyways, yes. It’s easy and satisfying. All my friends are here too in the Reapers. You, Gin-chan, Takasugi, Zura, Sakamoto, Mutsu and the rest.”

Shinpachi heard the annoying tone in her voice loud and clear. That, however, didn’t stop him from sending a wondering glance her way with clear dissatisfaction from her answer. The girl is like a like sister to him after all. In the end, he gave up when she glared back at him and walked out the meeting room and into the kitchen to make some snacks to the redhead and their soon to arrive guests. “If you say so Kagura-chan.”

When Shinpachi left she could finally eat her egg on rice in peace. She couldn’t help but smile as she thought about all her friends. She happily munched at her food while wondering when Gintoki would return. They had apparently gotten an odd jobs request and he had asked her and Shinpachi to meet up with him as quickly as possible at the Yorozuya office while he took their guests to the office with him.

‘I wonder what it could be? I’m sure it’s about a runaway cat or something, uh huh.’

She soon would get to know, that it’s not.


	2. A Job Request

"You were the one who asked me from the very beginning! And don't call me Hijkbaka! Come back here and do your job already you punk!" With that comment Sougo stopped in the middle of the street which made Hijikata unsettled for quite big vital reasons. 'What the hell is that idiot doing now?'

Before he could think about it any further he saw a missile flying his way. In the last second possible he dodged, the projectile made contact with the wall behind him and exploded; Hijikata cursed. "Damn you Sougo! What the hell do you think you're doing?"

"Tsk, I missed" Sougo mumbled. "Because you're talking I can assume that you're still alive and kicking, right Hijikata-san~?" He spoke in his normal pitch this time for Hijikata to hear.

"Of course I am you idiot! What the hell do you even think you're doing in the beginning?" Hijikata muttered angrily.

"Just wanted to test your reflexes, that's all." Sougo said it with utmost sensibility yet unemotionally. Someone like that would never want to "test your reflexes"

"Like hell you wanted!" Hijikata took out his sword and charged to slice the idiot before him but stopped promptly when he saw a poster on the wall behind where Sougo had stood until just a second ago before he dodged. _"Yorozuya Gin-chan, will do anything for money."_ He read out aloud.

"Huh, what are you saying Hijikata-san? You gonna become a Kagema? **[1]** " Sougo asked while Hijikata tore away the poster from the wall. "Of course not Sougo you idiot! We're gonna do some research on this business to see if we can trust them. If they do anything for money they must have had their fair share amount of customers. That however, doesn't necessarily make them trustable. We're police after all and we need to be very cautious."

"Whatever you say Hijikata~"

After three painful hours of inspection and questioning around kabuki-chou they came to the conclusion that, yes, they are rather trustable.

Some weird mail girl that wouldn't stop running around while they questioned her told them that the leader of the group Sakata Gintoki had kindly helped her out and saved her life together with her job when her scooter had broken one time. Another scary brunette woman told them that her brother works there and that he and his leader had saved her from selling her body to some ugly green amantos with weird hairdos and big ass noses. Other people around Kabuki-chou told them that they had seen them help people from criminals and saved lives or helped them out as well. They asked the same woman how the members of the "yorozuya" looked. She told them that her little brother is as plain as you can be with a human on, the girl of the trio has fiery vermillion hair and azure blue eyes so she wouldn't be hard to miss. And apparently the leader has a silver colored perm with red dead fish eyes.

Luckily for them, on their way to the address Sougo spotted a man fitting the description of the leader perfectly. He stood before a ramen stand and talked with the owner of it who had a black pair of glasses on. "Hijikata-san, isn't that the leader of the group based on the descriptions we got?"

"Oh, you're right Sougo, good job!" He praised.

"I'm not a dog Hijibaka." Sougo retorted back.

"Shut up I know that already!"

They walked towards the man and the ramen shop. "Hey there old man, you're Yorozuya Gin-chan right? We're from the Shinsengumi police force. Hijibaka Touishirou and Okita Sougo." Sougo greeted. "Don't introduce me as Hijibaka you idiot! Take this seriously!"

The man on the bar stool turned around to look at these so called "police officers". He had an unpleasant frown on his forehead as he started to talk. "Who're you calling 'old man' huh? I'm still in my twenties you know! Just because I have a perm doesn't mean that I am old, does it? Is my perm everything you see? Is it that bad? Should I just go and shave of every last bit of it huh? Should I? Should I?!"

"This is not good Hijikata-san" Sougo whispered. "This man clearly have a perm complex."

"Oi! I can hear you, you brat. What was your name again" the man pointed at Sougo "Sofa-kun right? I'm sure it was that, and you." He switched from Sougo and pointed at Hijikata instead. "Yours was Oogushi-kun right? What do you two possibly want from my Yorozuya business hum?"

"My name is Hijikata Toushirou you perm head! And aren't you supposed to tell us who you are too before we go over to the businesses?" Hijikata hadn't even known this agitating idiot for five minute, heck, he didn't even know this person at all yet. But he already despised the bastard from the bottom of his heart.

"I am so sorry Oogushi-kun and Souichirou-kun. My name is Sakata Gintoki, Boss of the yorozuya." Gintoki answered with a (not so) polite tone.

"As I said. My name is not Oogushi-kun. It's Hijikata Toushirou you idiot!" Hijikata screamed Gintoki while at the same time Sougo seemed to have a conversation with him. "Okey then Danna, but we already know your name."

"If you already know it why did your idiotic friend here ask for it? Has he a short term memory? If he has he shouldn't be a police officer, what are you gonna do when you chase someone. Turn left or right? You don't know, because you don't remember! You'll end up turning left when the criminal turned right! What are you gonna do then huh? HUH?" Gintoki asked nonchalantly.

"Ok, that's enough you silver haired and permy idiot!" Hijikata took up his sword to once again slice an idiot before him. The man sat calmly still as if nothing was about to happen while picking his nose, still nonchalantly. Which enraged Hijikata _even_ more. Sougo stepped before him and blocked the attack. "Calm down now Hijikata. We need him you know."

"I don't care anymore. I'm gonna kill this idiot!"

"So, why don't you two policemen follow me to the office? I'll text my two subordinates to meet us up there." The man started to talk again as if nothing just happened. He took up his phone and messaged two people. Then stood up from the stool and started to walk down the streets; waving to the two others to follow him, and they did.

"he seems chill, I like him."

"shut up Sougo."

* * *

The first thing Sougo laid his eyes on as he entered the Yorozuya "office" together with Hijikata was a beautiful young lady with long vermillion hair and azure blue eyes sitting on a blue couch. He could swear that someone had taken the whole sea itself together with the blue sky just to put them in her eyes. By the looks of it she couldn't be older than twentie or younger than eighteen. And not to forget the curves of her body, that white cheongsam that were cut up at the sides exposed her porcelain legs perfectly, but never would he admit that he's been this 'mesmerized' by a girl he laid eyes on for literally less than a minute ago.

His wonders turned out to be right when he sat down on one of the couches opposite of the three employees and the 'boss' of the trio introduced them. "So let me introduce you, Oogushi-kun and Souichirou-kun this is Kagura 18 years old and this is Shinpachi, Patsuan for short, 20 years old."

"The names Sougo, Danna." Sougo said out bluntly while his superior screamed at him for his respectless attitude towards a police officer. "My name is Hijikata Touishiro you perm head! Show some respect!"

"Yeah yeah no one cares, so what's the job request about?" Gintoki retorted.

Hijikata took a smoke from his newly lit cigarette to calm himself down not caring about the fact that he's indoors. Thinking carefully what to say to not give out too much classified information he rubbed his temples and then talked. "It's about this mornings murder. The suspects is either the Untamable Beast or the Lightning Spear. We haven't been able to track any of them down. And there are no fingerprints anywhere, even if they do kill by hand. So we'd like to ask the Yorozuya for help, it is said that you'll do any job for money, Is that correct?"

Shinpachi felt a huge mountain of stress well over him at that exact moment. He felt himself sweating. Did they suspect them, pretending to give them a job? Have they seen through this whole Yorozuya business of theirs? Or did they just want to give them a job for real and they're actually not suspecting them? Kagura and Gintoki looked unfazed by it all. But he knew that they're somehow panicking deep down just like him. He felt as if he was gonna throw up all the snacks he just ate any minute now. He can literally feel the taste of vomit in his mouth by now. The stress building up inside is just too big.

"Yes that's correct, uh huh. We'll take on the job."

And there goes his snacks. Kagura, Kagura herself had just accepted the fucking job request. He stood up from the couch and hurriedly ran into the toilet. He didn't waste a second starting to puke. How can his friends sit there, unfazed by it all? When Kagura is the one behind it all! Is she gonna turn herself in? He can't let her do that!

"Why did your friend just rush of like that?" Sougo raised an eyebrow in suspicion. Why did that glasses guy run off as quickly as the chinese girl before him mentioned that they would take on the job? He looked suspiciously at Gintoki who's currently picking his nose like the vermillion haired girl. Which surprisingly for him wasn't such a huge turn off as he'd normally think it would be.

Gintoki coughed to get the attention from the remaining people in the room and thereafter began talking, giving his answer. "No idea, maybe he has a weak stomach for gore?" He felt how Kagura looked up at him as if he was the biggest idiot in the universe. "Gin-chan, we haven't even seen any gore yet."

He punched her in the head with his jump while the two other men looked at this whole mini drama in confusion. "You can always imagine! And what if we just reminded him about an old trauma from the past?" 'More like trauma from today.' Kagura thought bitterly

"Could you two stop with your futile little fight and listen to what our request is?" Hijikata barked.

Gintoki switched his attention from the girl and into the two Bakufu dogs. "Ah, I'm sorry Oogushi-Kun. My daughter is untamed and mannerless."

"Who're you calling _your_ daughter?!" Kagura hissed at him. My only family is my _biological_ dad and brother!"

"You actually don't mind getting called untamed and mannerless, China?" Sougo asked in a teasing tone. What sane girl out there wouldn't mind being called untamed and mannerless. When he spared it a second thought. He guessed that the Untamable Beast wouldn't mind, it's in her name after all but a girl like this could never be the oh so famous queen. It's just a coincidence. He's sure of that.

"Of course not. No point in denying things you surely are. And hell i'm proud of it!."

"You sure are a strange girl, huh?" Sougo nonchalantly asked.

Kagura kicked him (loosely) on his right leg under the table. "Who are you calling strange you tax robber!?" He kicked her back "You just told me that you don't mind being called of what you obviously are, so why are you denying it **now**?"

"You little…!"

And their bicker went on and on. With Sougo calling her an ugly china pig that should be chained up to know her place. Kagura retorted with telling him what a sadistic loser he is, and that he's the one who should be chained up as she's just an "innocent" young lady while he's a sadistic asshole for a tax robber who's abusing his power. Which wasn't entirely a lie, though she's not innocent in the least. In the end they ended up brawling on the floor. Kagura took one of Gintoki's jumps and smacked it onto Sougo's head. Gintoki screamed in agony.

In the end Hijikata couldn't take their annoying and completely idiotic way of flirting anymore and screamed at the two young adults. "Stop flirting you idiots! We're here to tell them about the job, not to find a mate!"

"You seriously think that I would try to mate with a nose picking unfeminine and unmannered pig for a china girl? Really Hijibaka? You really think I would sink that low?" Sougo asked, slightly annoyed.

"Who're you calling pig you sadistic bastard!?" Kagura once again kicked the officer and he kicked back.

"You're still only getting offended by that? What about the rest of the insults. That was seriously the mildest one and that's the one you're getting all angry over?" Shinpachi who just came back from the toilet heard everything, and was now screaming at his coworker.

Just as everyone was about to start bicker again (even though they just met minutes ago) Hijikata cleared his throats and began talking "Ok, can you guys kindly shut it? We've got a whole group of murderers to take care of not to mention that we're out after two of the most dangerous from the group. Sougo, give them our current information about the case.

"That's classified information Hijikata-san."

"Not now Sougo, this is important."

Sougo took out a bundle of papers from god knows where, looked them through quickly and then gave out the "classified" information.

"This is what we currently know about the murder this morning, the Untamable Beast and the Lightning Spear."

 **The Murder Scene**  
 _It all happened in an alleyway near snack smile, around 4pm in the morning._  
There were no survivors and no witnesses.  
All the victims' body parts were detached from were they originally belongs and they were clearly tortured to death none too gently.  
There were no fingerprints from the murderer at the scene and there are no murder weapons found. They looked to be killed by hand but there are still no fingerprints so it's likely that they took their murder weapons with them if there was any.

"Just our goddamn luck…" Kagura interrupted bittery.

"Shut up piggy, I'm still going through the information" Kagura scoffed angrily at Sougo but let him continue without any protests anyway.

**The Untamable Beast/The Yato Queen  
** _I hate both her nicknames, they're dumb and childish but let's continue._

Sougo could swear that he saw that China doll, he meant beast, he meant beast, and only beast, look at him with a murderous stare. If looks could kill, he may have been in a hospital right now. But he decided to ignore her "murderous" stare.

_She's clearly a female and a sociopathic one at that, maybe even psychopathic. But that's highly unlikely as she's working with other people, psychopaths are loners that doesn't care about anyone. They only use others. While sociopaths are a milder version of psychopaths that does feel for others-_

He got interrupted once again. By the Yorozuya boss no less. "Sofa-kun I thought this was information about the beast, not a psychological class about psychopaths and sociopaths _._

"Shut up and let me continue Danna, I was just about to get into the other part!"

_Age is unknown together with appearance, length, and weight but we know that she does torture her foes to death by hand very similarly if not identically as in this case. That's why she's suspected. Though no witnesses were there at place so it's not all clear if it's her, the Lightning Spear, both or none.  
She's the culprit for the murder against some high ranked Oniwabanshuu ninjas in Kabuki-cho Park some months ago, the murder of several Bakufu officials in Yoshiwara one year ago and many other murder cases between today and the past four years. If she's been up to other crimes besides murder then she's clearly more professional than we first thought because we have no information about something like that whatsoever._

"Why would we need her length and weight?" Kagura asked.

"The real question here is, what the hell did some high ranked ninjas do in Kabuki-cho park in the first place, is it that easy to find ninjas nowadays?!" Shinpachi bluntly asked, as if it was obvious that high ranked ninjas shouldn't be at a local park, where they easily could get found and assassinated before they assassinate their target. It seemed as if it wasn't that obvious to the others here in the room though. Sadly enough, he got ignored when Sougo took up his sword and punched Kagura in the head with the edge of the scabbard. "Wow, you really got no brains China."

Kagura rubbed the bummer on her head with the palm of her hand while shouting angrily back at the officer "SHUT UP AND WHAT WAS THAT FOR YOU IDIOT?! YOU JUST MADE IT CLEAR THAT YOURS ARE EVEN SMALLER!"

the two young adults began bickering again and Hijikata didn't know what to do other than shouting. "Shut up both of you, Sougo, continue!"

"Hai, hai, Hijibaka."

"Don't call me that!"

Sougo cleared his throat and proceeded to continue. Once again, ignoring Hijikata.

**The Lightning Spear**

_The leader of the group, supposed to be male, but you never know. He's also suspected. He's more sociopathic than the Untamable Beast and therefore less discreet._

"Wait! So now you're sure that they're sociopaths and not psychopaths?" Gintoki cut in.

"Gin-san please." Shinpachi pleaded.

"Stop interrupting him you perm head! Sougo, please continue… for the 100 nth time for today." Hijikata felt more and more done with their shit for every second that passed in this room filled with complete idiots. Well, not as much as Shinpachi did at the moment though.

"Haai~ Hijibaka."

"I said stop calling me that!" Hijikata snorted 'Damn brat'

_He's been the culprit of many murders throughout all of Edo. Yoshiwara, Kabuki-cho, the terminal, other planets etc. He's more dangerous than the Untamable Beast and more experienced, however, because of his indiscreet behavior and attitude we've had several witnesses throughout the past four years that's been lucky enough to survive his aggressive and brutal attacks. They say that he has orange or red hair. They couldn't tell the exact color and his eyes were either blue or green. They also said that he's around 170 cm or something like that.  
Anyone of you who knows a person who fits into the description?_

Shinpachi had a very hard time believing that these officers seriously was this dumb. How did they even get their jobs in the first place? No seriously!? Kagura clearly fits into the description they just received, she may not be 170 cm or male, but she clearly fits in. Besides, if they put two and two together they'll clearly see that she has some connections to the Lightning Spear, just look at her! They could easily figure out that they're relatives if they just tried. He was dangerously close to scream at the two clearly oblivious and stupid policemen about the whole truth until Kagura opened her mouth to tease the sandy haired officer. "Since when did you start behaving like a proper officer you sadist? You sure as hell haven't been doing that since the moment you step foot in here."

"Since I first saw you, you've been so disgusting that I can't but behave in fear of you committing a crime before my very eyes. For every minute that passes. The Properly I do it." He teased back.

"What did you say?!"

Shinpachi and Gintoki needed to at least admit that he wasn't that much out of track, even if he only was teasing her.

"So, what's the reward for finding them?" Gintoki decided to butt in, clearly already bored with all of this. For god's sake he just wanted the reward and go off to the nearest pachinko bar already! Maybe to Yoshiwara later to go and meet Tsukuyo too.

"Yeah, about that. As you're a business famous in both the shady and bright side of Edo, I'm sure you three can get some information." Hijikata casually took a smoke from his cigarette before continuing. "Oh and take it easy, even if we know that you're well liked by the mafia, black market etc, we won't arrest you. You have yet to commit any actual crimes. The payment for all of this will be ¥50 000. Is that enough?"

If they just knew what kind of crimes the three of them have committed, they wouldn't be so friendly then. They would even arrest them at the drop of a hat,

"If it's enough? We're talking about the Reapers here, the two most dangerous ones from the Reapers no less. Of course it's not enough. Our life's may be in danger. Don't underestimate the shady business side of Edo! The black markets together with the red light districts with the mafia and yakuza who rules there ain't no joke, one wrong move and we're dead". Gintoki spat out. They may be from the Reapers, but that doesn't necessarily mean that they're well liked by the black market. Even if they rule over one bit of the market, the rest of it aren't that friendly.

"What about ¥90 000 then Danna?" Sougo asked.

"Add another 10 Souichirou-kun and we'll talk business."

"Ok then, ¥90 010. Good enough? Also the names Sougo Danna." No matter how many times Sougo corrected the man, he just wouldn't get his name right.

"Well played Sofa-kun, but we both know that I don't want my ¥10 so far back."

Hijikata sighed. Were they even allowed to give them this much money? Ah well they couldn't let those two monsters roam around like this any longer. They don't have a choice but to give in to his command. "¥100 000 it is then? Happy now perm head?"

"Come on Gin-san, Kagura-chan. We've got a job to do!" Shinpachi were totally sold of from the very beginning, but with this much money in reward, he sure as hell was gonna take it more seriously than ever. (Even if they needed to lie forth their reward)

When Gintoki, accompanied with Kagura and Shinpachi walked out the room Sougo could swear that he saw a black tattooed **R** mark on Kagura's right ankle. He decided to once again shrug it off for the nth time that day. But little did he know, that all the Reapers has a tattooed **R** mark somewhere on their bodies.

* * *

When they were a great distance from the office, Gintoki finally called out to the woman before him who was surprisingly eager to catch the culprit. (Who was her herself) "Kagura."

"Uh, What is it Gin-chan?" Kagura slowed down and asked.

"I think that Sofa-kun saw your tattoo." Gintoki had seen how the boy had looked at her ankle when they walked out, and it hadn't put him at ease in the slightest. Just making him worry more. The girl before him though, seemed to be more worried than he was. Shinpachi went over to a trash bin and started puking while Kagura finally did utter some words than just staring straight at him with widened eyes. "No way!"

"I told you that you should've tattooed it into your back like me or on your arm like Patsuan!" He retorted back. The last thing he wanted is to make that man suspect them. The aura that guy sent out ain't no joke.

"But then everyone will see it when I'm wearing my cheongsam dress or a bikini." She declared in defense.

Shinpachi went back to his companions and corrected Kagura. "Kagura-chan, with your chinese type shoes that you wear around all day barefooted you're already making it quite difficult for yourself. You should choose shoes that goes all the way up your ankles."

"Who asked about your opinions you virgin?" Kagura retorted angrily. She liked her shoes and doesn't want to switch them for some other ugly shoes. She's not a traitor. Not even to her shoes!

"I thought that we said that we wasn't gonna talk about that!" Shinpachi screamed at Kagura with a face flushed red.

"You said, I didn't." She retorted back.

"Calm down you too, geez. Gintoki turned around to Shinpachi. "And Pattsuan there's nothing wrong with being a virgin. It just makes you into another loser without a future."

"Oi" Shinpachi screamed as disapproval.

Gintoki ignored Shinpachi and turned around to Kagura instead. "And Kagura-chan, lets go buy you some new clothes. Mostly shoes."

"Chinese type clothes?" Kagura asked excitedly.

"Kimono." He stated.

"Go die Gin-chan."

"Wait a minute! Shinpachi almost screamed. "Should we really leave the office with two police officers in there?"

"Oh" both kagura and Gintoki said in unison. "Oh"

As Shinpachi said "God damn" all three of them realized that thanks to a lazy ass commander named Kamui, they have some valuable documents in there; future targets for the Reapers to assassinate and slaughter. They all three could only pray and hope that these police officers wasn't the prying type as they ran back towards the office.

Little did they all know, that all police officers are the prying type.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I tried ending it with some kind of cliffhanger. Though I don't feel I ended it that well. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter and next chapter will come out when I feel like it. I may update Marriage Meetings (after like 3 months…) or True Strength before that.
> 
> Also. How exactly the "R" shaped tattoo looks. I'll leave it up to you guys and your imagination. it's funnier that way, isn't it? Or at least for me because I am too lazy to describe them so... cough cough, til' next chapter then :)
> 
> [1] Kagema - More or less a Japanese male prostitute. lol.


	3. Backup Please!

As soon as the three Yorozuya members left their office and were out of reach, Hijikata gave him specific orders to look around the place for possible "evidence". He didn't need to ask why as he knew very well why already. Those three were certainly suspicious in more than one way, even if Sougo thought that such a girl never could be related to the Reapers, he could as well be wrong.

There were many things leading to their suspicion anyway,

_One: The glasses boy got very distressed to the point that he needed to take an emergency turn to the bathroom after his little China friend accepted their request, not to forget that his distress began as soon as they stepped foot in the room with their Shinsengumi uniforms. Yet again, many people get distressed when the police enter their house, but not to that extent that they need to puke._

_Two: the China girl glared daggers at him when he insulted the Beasts nicknames. Whether or not that's because she is the Beast or just another Reaper member who admires her is unclean. But there are also words about her being the most beautiful of all Reapers. He would never admit it out a-loud but he doesn't think that almost anyone could be prettier than that. So she's either the Queen or just a civilian… a hot one in that case…_

_Three: The same China girl had an_ _**R** _ _marked tattoo on her ankle. The letter_ _**R** _ _is known to be their trademark symbol after they've killed so it would make sense that it's their trademark tattoo too. The rest speaks for itself._

_Four: still same China girl's appearance matches the description of the Lightning spears very much. That is if he indeed has red hair and blue eyes. Vermillion red and azure blue to be more specific._

These are the most obvious suspicions he laid eye on from that he and Hijikata entered the Yorozuya house until that the three members owning the place carelessly exited it. How careless really.

Even if some of their actions exposed a bit he needs to admit that they are great actors. The boss and china girls facial expressions never even changed the slightest when they told them about the Reapers, that glasses boy gave everything away though together with her exposed ankle and as mentioned the glares he received from her.

He could already feel the adrenaline of an upcoming battle in his veins. He'd gladly cut of some Reaper heads. Even if it's supposed to be the other way around. Not that he could care less about that; he loves to turn things upside-down, especially Hijikata's life.

Now he only needs to get his hands on some evidence; no one believes mere words, they are just covers for hundreds of lies and empty promises in the end. The question is just, how? And where?

Sadly enough. It's his job as the police to figure that out himself with interrogation methods and what-not, even if he felt like giving all that work to Hijikata.

Sougo was just about to open the upper drawer on the boss's desk until he heard a cow speak. (Wait, cows can speak?) "Sougo, there's nothing here. Maybe they are innocent after all. We're dropping this inspection and returning to our original plan how much it may hurt MY pride, depending on the idiots with helping us with this."

Sougo retreated his hand back to his side and looked questionable at Hijikata. "Wait Hijikata-san, I feel like we shouldn't drop this. I bet all my sadistic sex tools that they're worth inspecting."

"That's… a lot of tools…" Hijikata commented.

"So what? They're precious to me." He bluntly stated as if it was the most obvious thing in this world.

Hijikata coughed and proceeded to speak "Sougo, I'm telling you that we won't do any good in continuing this. So let's just wait until they return and stick to our original plan, shall we?"

Sougo's red eyes met Hijikata's blue ones in a staring contest. After a whole minute of glaring, Sougo walked up to Hijikata and took his hands. "No, I refuse. It's not meant to be like this. If we won't, what'll happen to our friendship (hate)?"

Hijikata felt how his food was on its way up his throat as he retorted (screamed) back at the totally corrupted young adult before him. "Is it just me or did you just refuse me like this was some goddamn love confession!? Off with your hands!"

"Why Hijikata? It's just holding hands." He smirked up at him and spat at his face with a sadistic smile.

Before the now fuming Hijikata could slice him with his sword (again) he quickly dodged out of the way. "You totally insane idiot! Would you even go to the heights of pretending to be gay to be able to abuse me you punk?"

Hijikata wiped away the phlegm on his face while Sougo defensively protested. "Hijikata, I don't like your comment towards gay people, it's insulting towards them."

"You're the one insulting all gays! And when did you even start to care about other people's emotions or people overall?!"

Sougo looked Hijikata straight in the eye, pretending to be hurt while taking his hands to his chest. "Ouch that hurt, any man can change if he wants to you know."

Hijikata felt how his patience was laying on thin ice here if it wasn't for this idiot being his fiance's younger brother and soon his brother in law he would've killed him long ago. "I clearly know that **you don't want to**!"

"So?"

"Let's just skip this and get back to topic: we are **not** gonna go any further into this."

Sougo twirled around slowly with his hands in the air and closed eyes in a try for dramatic effect. "But Hijikata-san~. You can't ignore that the lightning spears descriptions match with China's appearance. She may not be the Lightning Spear himself, as he's male, but at least a relative of some sort. Even if he said it nonchalantly void of emotion, Hijikata could still feel the ting of annoyance and venom echoing from his voice. However, he was not gonna give up on this matter. "Give it up Sougo, it may as well be a coincidence."

"Yes Hijikata-san, people who look miraculously alike is always a coincidence nowadays." Sougo said it with such fluent sarcasm that he wasn't sure himself if he was sarcastic or not. 'Damn, I'm good' he thought.

"If it were that simple, we, the police wouldn't be needed Sougo." Hijikata retorted with a futile attempt to convince him, he failed.

"Exactly, it isn't that simple, the China girl may as well be the beast when we're at it. I know that you think so too, Idiot mayonnaise addict." He, in turn, tried to convince Hijikata with his blabber. Only to also fail miserably.

"Oi! Don't call me that! Whatever you say, no, she's not. We can't even find any evidence. Let's just wait until they return now and stop snoop around."

"Snoop can have different meanings Hijikata, snoop dog for example."

"That's not a different meaning, it's an artist!" Hijikata screamed.

"Same shit."

"Like hell it is! And aren't we on a totally different topic right now?!" Hijikata at that exact second swore that he was so done with this boys shit. And the second after that, he could feel something sharp biting his head and everything went black. Some further seconds after that, he could hear a hysterical laughter coming from his subordinate. 'Fuck!'

* * *

 On their way back to the Yorozuya, Gintoki called a specific person for backup in case the worst were to happen.

The phone rung several times before someone picked up, finally.

"Hello?" A sleepy voice answered on the other end of the phone.

"Ah, Abuto! I am so happy that you were the one who picked up and not you know who." Gintoki sighed a sigh of relief. "Kamui isn't the most cooperative and helpful person out there if you know what I mean."

"Yeah, I get it." Gintoki swore that he could hear a worn out and desperate sigh when he replied and then returned to his normal half bored tone when he continued. "But neither am I. I don't like helping humans, bye."

"Wait!" Gintoki whined desperately. "I'll give Kagura-chan the phone ok, ok!? We need your urgent help, ok, buddy?"

"Don't call me buddy. And sure, I'll gladly talk with the little missy." Once again, Gintoki could hear an exasperated sigh on the other end.

Gintoki turned over the phone to Kagura while they kept on running.

"Hi Abuto, how are you doing?" Kagura cheerily asked. She knew that being her brother's right hand is incredibly draining. So asking how he has it may cheer him up a little.

"I am doing fine for once, and you then?"

She could hear Shinpachi screaming from the sidelines. "We're asking for his help! Not calling him for some small yato talk!"

She ignored him and proceeded with the talk. "We need your help actually, uh huh."

"Yeah, I know that. Your useless boss whined about it just some seconds before." Luckily, Gintoki couldn't hear Abuto as the speakers were off.

"Yeah I know, such a drag. Anyway, you see. Two police officers are in our office right now. And you know, we kind of left them in there alone. With… the documents Kamui gave us last month… could we maybe get... backup?"

"you what! Of course you're getting back up! You better fix this or I'll personally kill your asshole of a boss!" She heard the venom and irritation of his voice as he said it. Knowing that their actions had made him lose it once and for all, she tried to sound nonchalant and non-caring. She really didn't have a reason to why, she just wanted to be the cool persona character for once, so she did. "Thank you! And actually… I don't mind if you do."

"Don't thank me and just fix this!" She heard beeping sound directly afterward and understood that he had hung up the phone. "Gin-chan, backup is coming yes."

* * *

 The last thing Abuto expected was for his phone to call while doing his (Kamui's) paperwork.

He picked it up and after seeing who the caller was, decided not to answer. But the persistent perm head wouldn't give in so after the third time he answered.

"Hello?" He knew that there was chaos to come, there always were whenever this idiot or the commander called, goddamn.

"Ah, Abuto! I am so happy that you were the one who picked up and not you know who." He heard from the other line. But he wasn't dumb, sure he called to Kamui's office. But Abuto is always the one sitting in this office and doing his commanders paperwork. And this sugar possessed human knew this fully well.

He heard a sigh before he continued, ah he really didn't have time for this shit. "Kamui isn't the most cooperative and helpful person out there if you know what I mean." Oh, he knew that fully well, thank you very much. "Yeah, I get it." He sighed desperately, even if he gets it, he is not gonna help this idiot out with whatever dept he has this time, is it to the old lady this time again? Or the bank? He doesn't care, he doesn't want to know. "But neither am I. I don't like helping humans, bye."

He was just about to end the call when the prick at the other end of the line began whining desperately. "Wait! I'll give Kagura-chan the phone ok, ok!? We need your urgent help, ok, buddy?" God, can't I at least get some sleep? Maybe if he just hear them out this once and take care of it quickly, he'll get to come back here, finish this huge pile of paperwork and then go to sleep. Yeah, he was sure of that. "Don't call me buddy. And sure, I'll gladly talk with the little missy." He sighed.

It took some seconds before someone on the other lines started talking again, it was the little missy. Someone he actually did like. "Hi Abuto, how are you doing?"

He smiled, finally someone who cared about his health. "I am doing fine for once, and you then?" He lied. He felt as if he was gonna fall face first into the floor any second. He hadn't gotten any proper sleep in a week thanks to a special brother. But he didn't want the little missy to get angry at her brother again because he treated his subordinate badly. He hated it when he came back sulking after their sibling quarrels. All yato's did, they didn't get any food and his temperament was worse than any girl on her period.

He could hear someone screaming in the background, probably the glasses guy. "We need your help actually, uh huh."

No… what did they do now? He began getting a feeling that it isn't about a debt anymore. "Yeah, I know that. Your useless boss whined about it just some seconds before."

"Yeah I know, such a drag. Anyway, you see. Two police officers are in our office right now. And you know, we kind of left them in there alone. With… the documents Kamui gave us last month… could we maybe get... backup?" He heard how her voice became smaller at the end and how she dragged it out. Halfway through her little speech and he already wanted to smash his head in the walls and strangle the life out of that boss of hers.

He couldn't hold his composure anymore. It all exploded and he swore to himself to personally kill that annoying idiot and he's gonna make sure to dye him with his own red blood at the end of the day. "you what! Of course you're getting backup! You better fix this or I'll personally kill your asshole of a boss!"

"Thank you! And actually… I don't mind if you do." Even if the little missy said she didn't care, he knew that she does. But that's not gonna stop him from tying a thread around silver hairs neck and drag down so he goes up. Or maybe he could just kill him with his own two hands and bath in the pleasure and relief that'll give him.

"Don't thank me and just fix this!" And he forcefully hung up the phone, slamming it down the table afterward; the table broke and all documents and paper on it fell down on the floor. He cursed loudly. It's always him… it always is.

After (un)successfully calming himself down (slamming his head on the wall around 20 - 40 times) he dialed a number on his commander's office phone.

"Yes, Abuto?" A cheerful and masculine voice answered,

"The little missy needs backup…" he simply stated. He knows that there is no need for petty little details around this man.

"Hmm…" he seems to contemplate something and deciding whether he would do it or not. Luckily for him, he seemed to be in his good mood today. God thank the heavens, or possibly hell. Whichever side it is that decided to help him. "I got it."

"Please, try not to destroy too many things when you arrive. Please?"

"Can't promise anything~" And the phone hung up on him. Well, that's what he gets for hanging up on the little missy before.

This is gonna be a long day, or week, maybe even month. Whether this problem gets solved quickly or not. God, what he hated his job. Sadly enough, he can't resign because the only talent he and any other yato out there has is the talent of murder, assassinating, killing and so on. And this place was the perfect place for Yato's and other misguided souls to do something about their one and only talent: using their skills for killing, swords, fists, and what-not while getting money out of it. It's not the most legal business he must admit, but people like them have no choice.

"Hijikata-san, look what your little tantrum made. The couch is split up in two, what are we gonna say when those three come back here hmm?" Sougo said with a deadpan expression while pointing at the now broken couch.

Hijikata threw a glass his way. "Sure, I may have set up a tantrum, but I wouldn't have if you just would have helped me get this dog's fangs off of me from the very beginning!"

"But the sight of a dog trying to swallow you whole, not to mention alive, really made my day Hijikata. I just couldn't let this chance of pleasure slip out of my hands." He patted the white dog behind the ear, clearly taken a liking to the dog. How couldn't he, when he tried to kill the person he hates the most. He was sure that they would become good friends in the future. It's just such a shame that he decided to let go when Hijikata accidentally sliced open the sack of dog-candy while blinded trying to actually slice up the dog.

"Die!" he heard Hijikata scream as he also put up his nth tantrum that day.

"geez, superiors nowadays. No patience." After hearing this, Hijikata's anger got fueled even more.

Did this respectless and fucked up kid really need to be his fiance's brother? Did the heavens really hate him this much…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter got very short because I am feeling more lazy than usual lately... Heck, I didn't even bother checking an extra time for grammars and so on and I wanted this posted as quickly as possible... Where did my motivation gooo!? Please call me if you find it, I'd appreciate it. My number is xxx xxx xx xx. (actually, just leave a review that usually boosts my motivation a great deal)
> 
> I'm sorry for that VERY weak Yaoi moment (if you're not into it), but I am a yaoi fan so… hehe… *drooling* I should have made something bigger but hehe, this is an Okikagu fanfiction and I personally ship Hijikata with Mitsuba so yeah.
> 
> And who do you guys think Abuto sent as a backup? Though I think I made it very clear…


	4. Let The Game Begin

"Kagura, as you're a yato and more physically capable than us. Can't you just run ahead?" Kagura turned her head to look at Shinpachi in confusion before uttering an amused "ohh" when she finally got what he indicated.

The stupidity of his own comrades really knew no boundaries sometimes. "Don't 'ohh' me! You should already be fully aware of your own capabilities!"

Shinpachi felt something hard hit his head. He turned around groaning in pain and finally realized that Gintoki had hit him, with his bokuto! **[1]** "Shut up! Can't you tell that I'm trying to read my jump here Megane?" Was what he heard seconds after.

Taken aback by his boss rude behavior, it took him a minute to compose himself and gather his thoughts. The idiot was reading a fucking Jump when they clearly have more important things to do right now! "Wait! Why are you reading Jump and running at the same time?! Why do you even have that Jump!? We're supposed to take this seriously dammit!"

Shinpachi looked to his left side only to see that Kagura was gone. "Eeh… wait a minute? Where'd Kagura go?"

"Weren't you the one who told her to run ahead?" Gintoki picked and flicked away a booger from his nose with clear disinterest.

"She could at least have told us _when_ she was gonna run off ahead." He felt the need to retort, how useless it may be before idiots like him.

"Your screeching made it very clear that you wanted her to do it immediately. Oh, and didn't I tell you to SHUT UP?! Some people are trying to efficiently read and pick boogers here!" Shinpachi, once again, could feel Gintoki's bokuto hit his already sore head.

Since when is _he_ the one who's done wrong, he isn't the one who always does as he pleases wherever he goes. Those two idiots are! He lovingly rubbed his head. (No one else was willing to rub it lovingly for him anyway.) "stop hitting me with your sword Gin-san! You're supposed to be the grown-up role model here, so act like one!"

"I don't remember ever telling anyone that I am the most mature and grown-up role model out there though!" Gintoki screamed back.

Shinpachi successfully dodged a third swing towards his head. Shinpachi snorted forcefully and took up a stone from the ground while continuing their never-ending marathon and threw it as hard as he could at Gintoki's right hand. He screeched out in pain; immediately dropping the Jump to the ground. "Gyaaa! My Jump, my Jump!"

"Don't you dare turn around and go get it! And who said you were mature?! I said that you're grown up! As you're a good bit over 30!"

"I'm still in my twenties you damn brat!"

Shinpachi looked blankly at Gintoki, void of any emotion. "I doubt…"

"You heartless bastard! I have a soul of a young boy! A young boy who only wants to read his JUMP! But his bitchy mom won't let him because he never listened at her the first time she called out for him to come in for dinner! I am so sorry okāsan **[2]**! Can I go get my Jump back now okāsan?!"

Irritation building up inside him he punched Gintoki in the head with his own bokuto, mostly because of revenge though. "Who are you calling bitchy?! Never mind about that! Who are you calling mom?!"

And their pointless bicker went on and on until they arrived -to their horror- before the Yorozuya office. Standing before them was no longer their office, but a junk. The whole two store apartment was in ruins, furniture that should have been inside the office was unfortunately **on the streets**. The worst thing yet is that they both were sure that everything is over for them. They're getting arrested now for sure, and when the old hag came back, what would Gintoki and Shinpachi say then? 'Oh I'm so sorry granny, two dumbass policemen and one bloodthirsty yato wrecked the whole place. Your bar included.' Like hell they could do that!

Shinpachi saw Gintoki slumping down on the floor on all four, already defeated and screaming at the top of his lungs. "All I wanted was **one** peaceful day! One! But no! All I get is: my Jump gets stolen from me by an annoying glasses stand" Shinpachi felt like screaming at that one. "A bloodthirsty yato destroys my home together with two dumb and useless policemen!" He agreed there though. "I want to sleep! But no, because my futon lies there, burned up, across the street! And where the hell did they do to my strawberry milk?!" Everything he cared about is his stupid sleep and sugar in the end! And he who thought that his boss once and for all would act according to the situation; big mistake.

Shinpachi felt his breath become more exhausted and panicked. He also, in turn, got down on all four. It wasn't because of exhaustion, but fury. He snapped. "I've spent years of cleaning up that rat house of a place, and now it's all for nothing! And the food! The food! Where is the food?! It's nowhere! It's not like we can afford anything you know! Kamui-san always ends up cutting our pay anyway!"

He tried to calm himself down by trying to even his breath. Only to snap again when Gintoki screamed at him from his left. "Well goddammit, Patsuan!" Gintoki switched to a sitting position. "Nothing gets restored just because you're sitting there screaming like an idiot!"

"Says the man who began it all!" He saw how Gintoki's patience was running thin just by looking at his panicked face. Just as Shinpachi's head was 1 centimeter from Gintoki's fist did they see two figures come out of the garbages and piles of junk. One of the figures held a purple umbrella and the other one held a katana. Shinpachi silently thanked them for saving him.

They could see the two figures clashing against each other just to separate the same second they struck and after that, they would come back to each other again; one of them dodging and it went on and on in the same pattern without rest. Sometimes but rarely one of them would fail at dodging, resulting with that person getting wounded.

Looking more closely and focusing their eyes to the fullest, the two men could somewhat tell who the two monsters were.

"Sofa-kun, Kagura! Stop this, you idiots!" Gintoki screeched in bitter despair. Gintoki got ignored as bitterly as he screamed when the two bloodthirsty beasts above the junk kept on swinging their deadly weapons towards each other like the wild demons they are.

"Interesting fight, isn't it?"

Shinpachi felt a (hundreds) shiver(s) run down his spine. Off all people that Abuto had to send, it was this person. There was no doubting it, that cheery tone, that voice. It's...

… and Gintoki screamed once again "I clearly stated to him that Kamui was the last person I wanted as help, and he is the one he sends!"

Kamui, said person who clearly heard everything from where he stood behind them with that fake smile and those shut eyes feigned hurt with a pout. "That hurt samurai-san, you know I came all the way here just to help you guys and my dear little sister. And I got some valuable information too..."

"What!? What is it!?"

"You sure scream a lot nowadays, huh, samurai-san?" Kamui asked as he walked next to the two men on the ground.

"You can thank your monster of a sister for that…" Gintoki muttered.

Pretending not to have heard anything (stomping on Gintoki's head for insulting his sister) he then answered. "As an answer for your previous question, those policemen have yet to know your or mine true identity. Those two only insulted each other until they both couldn't take it anymore and it escalated into a brawl."

"Yo chll thot ahg bhrwl?! Iths ahg fhkng wghar!" With pressure between the cold ground and Kamui's foot on his head, Gintoki's words became imperceptible.

"Hmm? What did you say samurai-san? I can't hear you."

"Ght th fhuhkg og mgh!" (Get the fuck off me!)

"Huh?"

"Kamui-san, maybe you should stop step on his head so he can talk properly…?" Shinpachi suggested shyly, because of fear and respect towards the yato.

"Ah, you're right glasses-kun. Why didn't I think about that earlier?" Kamui took off his foot from the middle-aged samurai's head. Said samurai quickly got up from the ground screaming at Kamui, not caring whether he was stronger or not. "You call that a brawl?! It's a fucking war!" He pointed at his before-to-be-house and screamed again. "It's all in ruins! In ruins I say! What about my weekly collection off Jump? My strawberry parfaits? My STRAWBERRY MILK?!"

Now, both Shinpachi and Gintoki were on their feet again.

Shinpachi took up a broken bar stool from the street (earlier owned by Otose) and punched his leader in the head with it. "That's all you care about?! The rest of the food?! The money this will cost us?! All new furniture we'll have to buy?!"

Gintoki rubbed his sore head, not caring about anything else at the moment he screamed in protest. "To hell with that! I want my parfaits!"

"Well, clearly no one else wants them!"

Gintoki gasped in horror. His own underling and trainee had just told him that no one cares about his **wonderful** parfaits. He clearly can't have that, as the proud sugar lover he is! "H-how dare you!" He stammered in seething anger. "Apologize! Apologize to all parfaits out there in the world right now!"

Kamui looked with amusement at the two bickering men. 'Wow, they're even worse than me and my sister when we're fighting over the last slice of meat. Oh no wait, never mind.'

Getting more bored with the minutes, Kamui heroically decided to step in and save (destroy) the day. "Samurai-san I'll help out my sister with her little brawl. And I'm cutting your pay with as much as 92% for insulting my sister, almost leaking all our secrets and destroying my afternoon fun; killing insects. See ya!"

"Wait, is that even legal!? Can you even cut our pay that much!?" Shinpachi complained while Gintoki, as usual, asked the most irrelevant questions for the moment in the most deadpan and calm face as ever. "You're deciding to act on your feelings now?"

"Gin-san, Kamui-san always acts on his feelings… only in a twisted sadistic extremely tsundere and psychotic kind of way." Even though the question itself is dumb and useless he still felt the need to answer it for clarification purposes only.

He saw Gintoki pondering on the answer for a minute and then hit his right fist on his left palm in excitement (something rarely seen on his face if not sugar or Ketsuno ana was before him) as if he figured out the answer of the most important quiz in the world. "So in other words, a yandere."

Deciding that enough is enough, and that he need to get some sense into this idiots head once and for all, he screamed. "He's not a yandere! Yanderes' doesn't act all tsundere, they openly show their twisted feelings and eliminate everyone that comes in the way of their happiness with their crush. However, sometimes they can act all sweet and innocent just to turn all psycho in a split second. They don't try to hide their feelings and they don't insult their love interest either!"

Shinpachi saw a rainbow of emotion cross Gintoki's face in 3 seconds (also something that rarely, no never has happened before) such as happiness, excitement and then a self-proclaimed smirk. 'No fucking way…' Shinpachi thought in horror.

"Wait a minute! Only another yandere can tell how a true yandere are. Shinpachi don't tell me that you?" Gintoki faked a horrified look. "Gyaaa! My own comrade is a yandere freak! Please don't kill me! I won't get close to Otsuu-chan I swear so please spare me!" He fucking knew it! This idiot just him it so that he could use it as an opportunity to openly tease and humiliate him. 'Stupid old geezer!'

"What the hell Gin-san!? I am no yandere!"

"You say that now, but after awhile you'll show your true colors and slice me open like the heartless killer you are!" Gintoki nodded nonchalantly at his own statement.

* * *

Feeling satisfied over the overburning rage on the glasses stands face he decided to let this matter go, and probably annoy him even more by ignoring him. Thus, shifting his attention to the two fighting monsters and probably an uninvited psychopath. 'Eh? Wait, what, where'd the three of them run off to. And, ISNT MY OFFICE WORSE NOW THAN IT WAS BEFORE!? IT'S BEYOND REPAIR NOW GODDAMMIT!' he inwardly screamed in clear and utter despair. Fuck it, he's gonna send Kagura away with a fucking postmark and the address written in clear writing just to make sure she gets delivered to her brother without delay or any possible hinders. As for the police officer, he yet didn't know. But he'll figure something out for that one too.

After Shinpachi also turned his head to the Yorozuya, the two men, once again, for the millionth time that day, screamed out together in despair.

This was certainly **not** one of Gintoki's good days. His house is beyond repair, Gintoki has never screamed this much in his whole life before, he got forced into playing the straight man character part, Shinpachi just becomes more and more of an otaku each day that passes by, Sadaharu who he suddenly spotted in a corner was slicing up all his yukatas with his claws, and was that Oogushi-kun's body in Sadaharu's his mouth?, he can't pay for any of the expenses and Otose were coming home from her little trip together with Tama and ugly cat any second now.

Goddamn it all... Goddamn, his turn of luck. Goddamn, his life!

* * *

"You two seems to have it rather fun." Kamui remarked nonchalantly as he watched his sister and an already on his to-kill list policeman fight some meters ahead of him on the rooftop of a skyscraper not so far from the Yorozuya -in ashes- building. (don't ask how they got there, crazy stuff happened) His guts told him in an alarming rate to be aware of the said policeman. Mostly because he's too close, oh so too close to his innocent little sister. Even if it were a mere brawl between two fellow warriors, he didn't like it one bit. As it's often that way yato men flirt with yato women to show off their strength to the women themselves to show themselves worthy.

Oh, boy was he happy that neither his lil sis (whom never listened to Abuto's classes about Yato history) or the annoying human policeman knew about said facts.

"Yeah, I'm kind of enjoying this actually. And who may you be?" the policeman asked him nonchalantly while pointing his sword at him as if nothing in the world mattered to him. As if he didn't know that he right this instant indirectly flirted with **his** little sister. Though he truly didn't know what he currently was doing but who cares? Kamui himself clearly doesn't, just the sole thought that someone is flirting with her -willingly or unwillingly- makes him seethe with rage. 'She's too young! she's too young! She's too young for this!' he tells himself, despite her being 18 already. Still, he doesn't care.

"I'm Kamui." He cheerily answered albeit somewhat nonchalantly. If this man pretended as if everything was as normal as if could be, then he would too, even if he already does it every day.

"eeh, is that so?" He could see the man before him smirk. 'Don't kill him yet, don't kill him yet, don't kill him yet don't kill hi-'

His thoughts were interrupted by the same man. "Why's that thing on your head dangling like a madman? You scared or something?"

Fuck patience and negotiations, he no longer cares about Abuto telling him not to make a fuss. He's gonna make sure this bastard knows his place!

* * *

Kagura watched as the two idiots before her had an aggressive conversation with each other, filled with sarcasm, nonchalance and was that anger she could feel emanating from her brother? 'Stupid aniki **[3]**! Taking yet another sparring partner away from me. And I was looking forward to beating this sadistic bastard up too…' Not to mention that Kamui forcefully had shoved her several meters away just to get in front of the sadist. She stomped her foot impatiently on the floor.

Their conversation quickly turned into that of an argument. And then into a who-can-insult-the-other-more-creatively contest just as she and the sadist had done right before their fight begun. She needed to admit though, they were rather creative with their insults. They used insults such as "carrot head", "katana nerd", "umbrella freak", "sadistic forever to be virgin", "psychopathic also forever to be virgin" etc. She knew that her brother was a virgin as he has no interest in women at all, but that sadist looks like one hell of a player so that one came as quite the surprise. Though it's just an insult made out of the blue, so it can as well be a complete lie.

A wave of irritation crept up to her because her brother just had interrupted them when things were getting fun. Damn her brother for taking her new rival away from her! "Can you two stop this! You're behaving like 7-year-olds, yes!" she screamed while impatiently putting her arms in the air with her umbrella at hand.

"As if you're one to talk!" Was the direct without hesitation answer they shot back at her before they went back to their useless bicker. Oh was she gonna make sure that both of them ate those words up. Or maybe she can stick them up their asses? The latter sounded better and more satisfying in her ears.

She walked towards the grown-up babies who screamed profanities at each other without break. Without hesitation or the slightest bit of guilt or regret, she took hold of the back of their heads, digging her nails into their scalps and felt how they both tensed up under her harsh touch -clearly understanding that shits going to happen- and slams their heads as hard as she could together. She bathed in the pleasure of their pained groans and screams as they rolled around down there on the ground in intense pain.

A huge crack on the ground had been formed because of the intensity of the hit beneath them were they currently were rolling around. She was rather proud of her new piece of art, a huge portion of skull blood in the cracks, two rolling men in pain, probably hundreds of brain cells lost. She smiled a self satisfactorily grin.

In pure reflex and instinct, as her brain progressed this as a clear win, she dipped her right index finger in one of the groaning men's blood (she couldn't tell who it was.) and drew a tiny **R** mark on the ground.

She immediately understood what she just had done and erased it with the palm of her hand before anyone could see. Luckily, that sadist was caught up in holding his skull and the overflowing pain in it to have realized anything. Or so she thought.

Her brother, on the other hand, saw everything and gave her a non-understandable look of confusion and, worry? They're both in the Reapers so what's the problem? He's even the commander of said gang!

Just then, did she look around and saw all the people around them. Looking at her with wide eyes.

That was also the moment when she realized that they had managed to get down from the freaking skyscraper. How did she not realize that? It must have happened when she slammed their heads together; the building must have collapsed out of the strong force. And she must have been so caught up in anger and irritation towards her brother that she didn't realize anything.

Shit.

ShitShitShitShitShit!

She needs to come up with an excuse and that quick. She could always tell the folk around them that it was all a silly joke, but even if she hated to admit it, the policeman rolling around mere meters away didn't look like the dumb type. If she were to tell everyone that it was a joke he would certainly suspect her, despite not seeing anything. He could always just ask her out on "what it was that was a joke" She knew that he already suspected her, and throwing things aside as a joke is one of the oldest tricks in the book after all. He would only start suspecting her more she was sure! However, she didn't have much of a choice now, did she? "Hahah" she fake laughed. "Take it easy now everyone, geez, it's just a joke. So easily fooled you all are, uh huh."

To her relief, they seemed to buy it, because soon everyone walked past them as normally as they did just before. She was a little surprised though. when the whole building broke down no one seemed to really care, or maybe she just didn't pay attention. But it's still annoying that when she draws an **R** mark with blood on the ground suddenly everyone cares. But of course, she forgot that this is Kabuki-cho she's talking about. Everyone here is used to this kind of commotion already.

She looked back at her brother who had in the time while she struggled with life and not getting behind bars sooner than she'd want to, sat up and gotten over the pain, to a certain degree.

So had the sadist. And his face was as deadpan as ever. "Good joke there China, I thought you were a real Reaper at first. You know, as you're helping us, you really shouldn't make jokes like that." He smirked at her.

"Fuck off rat face." Was her simple answer. More panic welled up inside her. He had seen it after all! Just how observant is this idiot really? And what was the point of overthinking and reacting when he would be so dumb as to actually buy her little lie? No, he's playing along. He's playing along with it all, damn it.

"Anyway, what did you and that nicotine addict do in our office anyway?" She asked, taking some steps towards him as she observed Sougo's every move to spot any kind of hesitation or flaws in his body language as he talked. "Asking you and your two comrades for help, obviously."

"That's not what I meant you sadist! I meant what the hell did you do when we left, yes? What did you do to Sadaharu?" She snarled after she finally realized that her fateful pet wasn't present at the moment.

'So that's the helpful doggy's name huh?' He stood up from the ground and dusted off his clothes thoroughly. "Now now, no need to growl at me China. Your behavior just now is quite suspicious don't you think? Are there any important documents in there, maybe?"

"How did yo-" she stopped herself when she realized that he obviously didn't know if there were any documents in there, but just asked a shrewd interrogation question. Seriously, damn this man. But she was just as shrewd. If it was a game he wanted, then it's a game he'll get. She kneeled down before him where he currently sat, rubbing his head and grabbed his collar."-you come up with that idea? I just don't like you prying around my stuff, yes! My underwear is in there you know!"

"Ah, you mean those black ones I found on the lower part of the closet? I gotta admit, you're quite daring China girl." Forget being shrewd, he's just a perverted policeman abusing his power! "W-what the!" She stammered "You pervert" Kagura was just about to punch the idiot but got cut short when Kamui threw his umbrella towards Sougo with full force, unfortunately to her dismay, she lessened her hold of his uniform collar and he gracefully managed to dodge Kamui's attack. 'The only thing this man can do gracefully is to dodge, huh?'

* * *

Kamui clicked his tongue in sheer frustration but put a smile on his face despite mentioned frustration. "Please do not talk about my dear little sister's underwear like that **ever** again. Or better yet, don't talk about her underwear again at all." Kamui has had the feeling of killing this sick pervert ever since he first laid eyes on him, but decided to restrain himself until now when this idiot pressed his last buttons without even intending to of course. But yet again, he really doesn't care if he was intending to make him angry or his sister embarrassed, he still reached his tolerance limit. (which by the way isn't that long.) It's just normal to lose it when some sick pervert points out someone else's little sister's underwear so normally. If there is something he really can't tolerate, then that's some unworthy and sick pervert hitting on his sister with such lewd topics. It's simply disgusting. Call him a siscon all you want, he's just making sure she's safe from men like **him**.

She can stick together with whoever she wants, as long as he has approved of that person. (In other words, no one.)

Despite his enraged state, he still had his calm smile on.

"So China is your little sister huh, didn't see that one coming. And it seems like you have quite the sister complex too." The perverted idiot mocked him. Being a protective brother is **not** the same thing as being a siscon! He's simply keeping perverts like him away from her, that's all for god's sake. And oh was he gonna feel happy after killing this bastard.

His smile has yet to falter.

"He had a mother complex too until she died, Yes…" He heard Kagura state. His smile faltered for the tiniest second as e punched his sister in the head for her inappropriate comment and gave her a cold look. She seemed to regret what she said as she averted her eyes, avoiding to look him in the eyes. 'As long as she understands.' He thought.

Surprisingly the pervert made no comments about the subject as he expected him to do, but commented on something else. He seemed to be the type who likes to torture people quite a deal like him so of course, he would expect him to push the matter further. But he only stood there and looked blankly at him and thankfully changed the subject, while Kamui still had that unwavering smile on his face. "You never stop smiling, do you, Carrot head?"

He saw Kagura sighing in relief as if thanking him for understanding the mood and for going around with it. He also decided to play along with it as he answered him blankly and coldly. "Of course I do, your smile is the ultimate weapon after all."

"Ooh, trying to be romantic, Carrot?"

His smile faltered into a disgusted expression.

"That's not what he was trying to say…" Kagura retorted angrily in his defense.

He got his smile and composure back after putting those disgusting thoughts which a weak comment like that had managed to give him aside. "Pay him no mind Imouto-dear **[4]** , he's just another pervert after all." Kamui smirked innerly in victory when he saw a vein popping up on the officer's chin. A win for him.

He had only known the man for a span of 10 minutes but already felt a rainbow of happiness each time he got irritated, angry or felt any other sort of negative emotion. "Now, please answer my sister's question thoroughly."

* * *

"What irony, me a police officer, getting interrogated instead of interrogating." He stated with a little bit of annoyance in his voice, doing his best as to not show it off completely, he was seriously getting to his edge here with these two siblings. "Anyway, we really didn't do anything improper. Hijikata suspects everyone and everything. He wanted to make sure if we really could trust you guys. We couldn't find anything suspicious so you're off the hook I guess."

Of course, it was all a lie, they are absolutely not off the hook after what he just witnessed. He was actually planning on letting the Yorozuya trio get away and stamped as innocent after some fair amount of arguing with Hijikata. However, after seeing the China girl making a bloody tiny **R** mark on the ground like the most normal thing in the world, he quickly changed his mind. Their list of reasons to arrest this girl just became longer and longer after each minute he spends with her. 'Does she really want to get behind bars that badly?'

The way she sketched that **R** seemed purely out of instinct. Not only that, but she is surprisingly strong too. A huge bonus that she's a yato. It's true that not all strong people necessarily need to belong to the Reapers because of their strength like some kind of crazy discount with buy one and get two for free. However, there are a really few numbers of Yato's not belonging to the group though.

That's where you actually **can** talk about a discount. Find one Yato connected to the Reapers, get 40 more just for free together with the annoying trouble you'll need to write a report about!

The offer was just screaming out to him. And he was not-so-happy about it, to be honest with himself after hours of his adrenaline running around his veins in hopes of an upcoming battle, he hadn't thought this out clearly before now. The Reapers may be heartless to outsiders, but according to information from Yamazaki whose managed to tail four Reapers in three whole days (a new record), they seemed to really care about each other. Taking on one and killing that one person would make the whole group your enemy.

And as lazy as Okita Sougo is, he really doesn't want to write down the paperwork coming up with it as an added bonus, that is if he comes out of the ambush alive **.** Even if it hurts to admit it, there was no chance he could take down hundreds of strong and angry warriors with around 70 - 80% of them being Yato's.

He got forced out of his thoughts when he forcibly got shaken by his shoulders. "Oi Sadist, you hear me? I don't care about that shit you shit head! I just want to know where Sadaharu is dammit! Be useful for me and tell me where he is, yes!"

Damn, this mission surely would take a while for him to accomplish, especially because of this pig who keeps on pushing his buttons. She may have the looks of a goddess (he couldn't deny that) but at this rate, she sure as hell wasn't gonna make it to his good side. "The doggy is perfectly fine I can reassure you that, he even got some afternoon snack. So calm down China."

He's made up his mind. When the time's right, he has enough information and when he's sure no one's there to witness it, especially not anyone in the Reapers. He was gonna kill this arrogant pig.

And he was gonna love every last second of it. But until then, he had a game to play.

A game of life and death with the China doll. Who will silence the other one first? Will he get enough evidence and kill her first, or will she make an opportunity to kill him before that and live on with her life?

There was quite a long time until he last had a challenge like this, and he saw forward to it. For added effect, he didn't see forward to many things out there.

"Well, I'll take my leave now if you don't mind, see ya." He stood up and walked past Kagura. When he was next to her he stopped for the tiniest of seconds and whispered: "Let the game begin, China."

* * *

**[1] Bokuto - Japanese wooden sword used for practice. But as we already know, Shinpachi and Gintoki use theirs in battle.**  
[2] Okāsan - the Japanese word for mom.  
[3] Aniki - the Japanese word for brother.  
[4] **Imouto-dear - Imouto is the Japanese word for sister and thus it just means "Sister-dear"**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Hijikata didn't escape Sadaharu in the end and I seriously cracked up several times while writing this little shit. Because I accidentally wrote sister-dead and my reaction was like 'Kamui no, your sisters right there, she ain't dead yet'. I also accidentally wrote, "as if you're one to walk!" Instead of talk and I don't know this just makes me laugh so much like how do I manage? Then let's not talk when I yet again wrote incoherent little sister.
> 
> I have never cracked up so much before while writing a chapter.
> 
> Anyway, I really do hope you guys enjoyed this chapter. And because I lazed around with the last chapter I put extra much effort into this one. And now I don't even want to read it ever again because of how many times I've reread and added stuff and erased stuff and just fixed the grammars. I don't even think I want to ever see this chapter ever again... My eyes burn...
> 
> Well, until next chapter! :)

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you liked it and please tell me what I can improve until next chapter. Criticism is always welcome as long as it is criticism and not plain and boring hate.


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